McTout blows on his bagpipes,
whilst Elspeth & Angus watch those notes go floating across the Waves.
Ferocious-Ness appears at once, and grabs a note or two for lunch,
And the whole of the Family Ness is not too far behind
Sporty-Ness leaps over him,
Turns up-side-down and dives back in,
And the beautiful Lovely-Ness shows she's the kissing kind!
Eyewit-Ness comes up for air,
And taking notes without a care,
He turns, with a crash, and a bash and and a splash,
To the Family Ness
You can knock it, you can rock it
You can go to Timbucktu
But you'll never find a Nessie in the zoo.
You could meet an anaconda
A giraffe or kangaroo
But you'll never find a Nessie in the zoo.
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You'll Never Find a Nessy in the Zoo was a single written by Roger Greenaway, Peter Maddocks and Gavin Greenaway. Based on the theme song, it was released in 1984 after the final episode was shown.
Upside-downy Bats,
And stripey Cats,
And Monkeys too;
Big Cow pats,
And keeper's hats
And things that "wiff" and "phew"
Birds that stand on spikey legs,
Whilst others "bill" and "coo",
Yes, there's an awful lot of sadness in the zoo.
You can knock it,
You can rock it,
You can go to Timbuktu,
But you'll never find a Nessy in the zoo.
You may see an Anaconda, a Giraffe and Kangaroo,
But you'll never see a Nessy in a zoo.
While Dolphins leap,
Sealions sleep,
Gorillas stare at you;
Camel rides,
And Penguin slides,
To catch a fish or two;
Sly Vultures look you in the eye,
And see you as a stew,
At feeding time they'd make a hearty meal of you.
You can knock it,
You can rock it,
You can go to Timbuktu,
But you'll never find a Nessy in the zoo.
You can go to Auctomuckty,
And to Drumnadrocit too,
But you'll never find a Nessy in a zoo.
Creepy-crawly things,
And yawning Kings,
Stay out of view;
Hippopotomi don't bat an Eye,
They Wallow in the goo;
While Cuddly Bears,
Just hug in pairs,
Highenas laugh at you,
And there is not a lot to laugh at in the zoo.
You can knock it,
You can rock it,
You can go to Timbuktu,
But you'll never find a Nessy in the zoo.
You may see an Anaconda, a Giraffe and Kangaroo,
But you'll never see a Nessy in a zoo.
You can knock it,
You can rock it,
You can go to Timbuktu,
But you'll never find a Nessy in the zoo.
You can go to Auctomuckty
And to Drumnadrocit too,
But you'll never find a Nessy,
No you'll never find a Nessy,
No you'll never find a Nessy in the zoo.
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